11 Comments
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Reuben Salsa's avatar

DEEEEEEJAAAAAY KHALIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIÌIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIID

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Loudt Darrow's avatar

ANOTHER ONE 👉

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Smillew's avatar

All I do is win

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Meg Oolders's avatar

"They decided to prematurely ejaculate a bunch of CGI avatars that look like discount Fortnite skins." Powerful prose, my friend. Welcome back. Just how many "vacations" a year do you take, anyway? 😏

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Loudt Darrow's avatar

You've caught me Meg they're not actually vacations, sometimes my real job requires all my attention 😭

(Which happens to be "live musician," very on-theme with the issue — qwerty or piano, smashing fingers on a keybed is clearly my calling)

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Meg Oolders's avatar

Oh, so you're just living my repressed dreams of rock stardom on the side, then? That's nice for you. 😏

What kind of music are you making? And where can I listen to it? If you're some kind of crooner, then forget it. My Substack celebrity crush card is maxed out at the moment. 🚫

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Loudt Darrow's avatar

I mean I can carry a decent Fly Me to the Moon 👀 But nothing critically-acclaimed (saving a few inspired shower performances I think would've been a hit had I recorded them)

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Smillew's avatar

The subheading is 👌

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Loudt Darrow's avatar

where is Pitbull man 😭

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Debdutta Pal's avatar

I used to think I can't write/do humor. Then I came across Matt Rife.

Who knew one day we would miss Pitbull? I guess this is nostalgia.

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Loudt Darrow's avatar

Just a public service announcement: if anyone is interested in developing a fandom for an aggressively handsome standup comedian who *also happens to be actually funny* then google Matthew Broussard

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